Choosing Peace Over Panic
A Conscious Choice
This isn’t just another blog. It’s a life moment. The first time I said no to a client.
I’ve mentioned before that I was a people pleaser in my teenage years. In my 20s, I’ve been working on breaking free from that pattern, even before I knew the term neuroplasticity.
Being a people pleaser comes with not being able to say no, even when you want to. I’ve suffered because of that. But I’ve been practicing saying no, starting with small things. Still, I had never said no to work before. Any work offered, I’d take it, no matter the reward.
The Breaking Point
About a month ago, I onboarded a new client. At first, everything was great: the people, the money, the work. But then came a manager who enjoyed dominating others. You know the type, always has to be right, even when he’s wrong. I remember he said there was a 500 tags limit on YouTube and I wasn’t using them all. I laughed so hard later because it’s actually a 500 characters limit.
At first, I brushed it off. Some clients act like that out of insecurity. But there’s a line between showing strength and trying to dominate. My motivation to work started fading.
Then came the final straw. My invoice was delayed. Almost a month of daily promises. On day 24, I told them I’d pause work until payment was sorted. I had already decided to quit by the end of the month, payment or no payment.
The Moment of Truth
The next day, the manager asked for some access, I informed them I’d transfer it once I got my payment. Funny thing, the accountant called the next day saying payment was being transferred.
I checked my account that evening and saw the money reflected. It was time to hit send. Time to finally say no.
But I hesitated. Every fear and insecurity whispered not to do it. My mind tried every trick to stop me. I almost changed my mind too. But then I remembered the agony of the delayed payment, the constant promises, and the manager’s power games. The pit in my stomach grew, but I hit send.
Choosing Peace Over Panic
For a few seconds, panic hit me. But then, nothing changed. The sky didn’t fall because I said no, but I felt calm. That pit in my stomach was gone. It was replaced by peace. I felt in control.
The manager tried to guilt-trip me later, but I had no regrets. I do not take validation of my work from someone other than me. My team and I gave our best. I’m glad I stood up for myself and said no.
This was more than just a professional decision. It was a personal milestone, the moment I proved to myself that I am no longer trapped in the cycle of pleasing at the cost of my own peace.
